508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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