Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
