let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
