hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
