New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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