I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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