It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
