your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
