I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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