I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
