Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
