don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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