Kiss
Puke
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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