It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Randomize