so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
