He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
