This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
