You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
