"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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