"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
