Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
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