Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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