Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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