mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
