I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
