Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I just blew my weed a kiss
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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