at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Less talking, more tequila
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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