Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We need to get me chipped asap
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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