If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
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