If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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