eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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