HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
