Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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