To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just found puke in my bra..
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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