Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
