can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
