did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
