Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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