I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
