for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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