Your tits are I can't wait for
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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