It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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