never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
