It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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