sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Dick very happy bro
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
