I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
