try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
