How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
