That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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