you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
