Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
