It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize